Leading through uncertainty: what charity leaders have to say about resilience

By Bird Resilience

I love the work—but the pace is unsustainable.

There’s this ethos of dying for the cause. That culture — this idea that if you love the work, you just suck it up — it doesn’t serve us or our missions.

I know how to support my team. But who holds the leader?

If these words feel familiar, you’re not alone.

Over recent months, charity CEOs and senior leaders across the UK have spoken to us candidly about the weight of leadership responsibility, the emotional toll of uncertainty, and the quiet fear that they’re not doing enough —for their teams, for their causes, for their own families.

What we heard was honest, thoughtful—and at times, deeply affecting. They also shared wisdom—about what’s helping, what’s shifting, and the kind of leadership the future demands.

This article brings together their voices, with one clear message: you’re not alone in feeling this. And you’re not alone in wanting something better.

The problem isn’t just pressure—it’s isolation

CEOs spoke of feeling deeply responsible for their teams’ wellbeing while having little support for their own.

“Leadership in this sector has become emotional labour,” one person told us. “You’re holding the team, the board, the funders—and often, no one’s holding you.”

Another described the pressure valve with no release, trying to lead through financial uncertainty, growing demand, and governance strain while still being the person who models calm.

Several had taken on a role that two people now share—an unspoken acknowledgement that the workload was never sustainable. Others reflected on feeling lonely at the top, especially when expectations keep rising and resources don’t.

Essentially, one of the biggest challenges in the sector is the feeling of being alone in the work. From our broader understanding of resilience, we know that isolation can deeply undermine our sense of safety. As Gabor Maté puts it, “Safety is not the absence of threat, it is the presence of connection.”

It’s not just you: burnout is widespread

Constant overwhelm is a common experience. “There’s no pause, no space to think,” one leader told us. “Everything is urgent. There’s no runway.”

Many described a culture where overwork feels normal. Leaders spoke of checking emails at midnight, working weekends, and being always on.

“Burnout is baked in,” one person shared. “We’re doing the work of underfunded public services and carrying the emotional toll, too.”

Many leaders feel pulled between compassion for their staff and making hard, necessary decisions to keep the organisation afloat. Several mentioned guilt—for not being more present with their families, for missing annual leave, for never quite being able to stop.

These pressures aren’t personal failings—but symptoms of a system that has expected too much for too long.

We don’t need to be more resilient—we need space to be human

This research highlights a quiet frustration with how resilience is framed.

“I’m tired of being told to be more resilient,” one CEO said. “What we need is space to recover.”

Others echoed resilience isn’t about individual strength. It’s about the systems, culture, and support that allow people to bounce forward – or even sometimes not to bounce anywhere at all, instead to feel what genuinely comes up, to process through it.

This means moving beyond self-care strategies (important as they are), and acknowledging structural causes of stress: governance, unrealistic workloads, role creep, and the unspoken expectation that leaders should always be fine.

The hard truth is these pressures aren’t ones we can relieve overnight. And some of them are much bigger than us.

We are only human. That doesn’t mean we stop caring. It doesn’t mean we stop hoping for change. But it does mean we can stop carrying the expectation that we must fix everything alone.

If the weight of it all feels heavy, it’s not because you’re failing—it’s because it is heavy.

What’s helping: time to pause, process and reflect

So, what does make a difference?

Leaders shared practices that helped them stay grounded—not as quick fixes, but as intentional acts of leadership:

• Creating space to think: Carving out time to step back from delivery and reflect strategically. “I book an hour a week just to think. No meetings, no email. It’s not a luxury—it’s essential.”
• Reflective practice: Coaching, supervision, or trusted peer spaces came up repeatedly. “It’s the only space where I don’t have to perform. Where I can admit I’m tired.”
• Naming the reality: Simply acknowledging the pressure—rather than pretending it’s fine—can be freeing. “We brought it into the open with our team. That alone changed the culture.”
• Small, structural changes: Setting clear boundaries around working hours, encouraging proper breaks, and refusing to glorify overwork. “We started calling it ‘life–work balance.’ That switch in language changed how we think.”

A different kind of leadership

Many leaders told us they were letting go of “hero leadership” in favour of something slower, more relational, and more honest.

One called it “loving leadership”.

“Not soft, not fluffy. Just human. Holding boundaries, listening deeply, caring enough to say no.”

Another reflected on how expectations from funders and boards make this shift harder than it should be. “We need braver trustees,” they said. “People who understand that care is not a distraction from impact—it’s a precondition for it.”

There’s no perfect fix. But the willingness to name what’s hard, share what’s helping, and care for ourselves as well as our teams—that’s leadership. And it’s already happening.

You are not alone

If you’re tired, stretched, or quietly wondering how long you can keep this up —you’re not broken or failing. You’re human. And you’re not alone.

The weight is a system that asks too much.

And while the answers aren’t always immediate or simple, what matters is that the conversation is shifting. We are questioning the old ways of working. Leadership is evolving.

Let’s build a sector where resilience isn’t about pushing through, surviving in silence—but about leading in ways that support, sustain and transform us.

This article is based on a research project by Bird Resilience. We work with leaders across the not-for-profit sector to create space for reflection, renewal and real culture change. If you’d like to explore what that might look like in your organisation, get in touch.